Oh my god. I just ate a fucking bag of parmesan garlic potato chips and now i'm at jack in the box. What the fuck is wrong with me? Fix me!

So, I joined a gym...

There's a small, yet serious fitness center about 3 blocks from my office. I walk past it every morning after dropping my son at his bus stop. I typically have about an hour to kill between dropping him & actually needing to be at work. So, today after work I walked over, took the tour, & signed the contracts.

This is a cool place. It's small & friendly. The people there are serious about working out & getting in shape. No one's there to cruise for potential one night stands. No one's judging. And there are trainers (real, educated, certified, college degreed trainers... not just some lackey with muscles & a few hours of community college) who are on hand to help you out, answer any questions, or (for a few bucks more) put you through the paces.

The logic behind joining a gym & agreeing to have my bank account debited each month is that if I am paying for something (& I will be for the next year whether I use it or not), I will certainly use it, because I hate throwing my money away.

Now... the real question is... am I ready to jump in & just get started tomorrow or do I want to wait & schedule one session with a trainer to be sure I'm doing it right first? Hmmm...

My Virtual Weight Loss Model

If you're a visual person (like me) this can be a useful tool. I was skeptical when I first found this site, but I think it really does a pretty good job at simulation my current size & shape. You can always go in & edit settings too, so you can remove pounds as you lose weight. Kinda cool.

Here we go...

Let's get this started. I'll make it pretty later. Pretty's what I'm good at... creating an image, getting attention, promotion. I'm good at making things stand out. I can design or decorate anything. Web design, graphic design, hair, makeup, furniture, homes, etc. You name it, I can make it look good & get attention. So why can't I seem to make myself look how I want?

Why can't I get back to the size I once was? Why does it seem like my body is just so hell bent on holding on to this weight no matter how hard I try? Well, whatever the answer one thing's for sure... I'm fed up! I'm tired of it & it's time to get focused, get serious, & do SOMETHING about it. What, I'm not entirely sure yet, but I know damn well that I'm not the only one out there struggling to do this & I'm tired of all the stupid blogs & websites written by fitness gurus & teams of experts & people I just can't fucking relate to. So why not start something new?

I'm inviting you (whoever you may be) to join me on this journey. I'll let you know what works & what doesn't. I share my success & my failure. I'll post pictures & videos & some days I might just bitch, whine, & cry about how much it all sucks & how much I'd rather just give up. We'll see where this goes...